Like any other healthily introverted kid, I spent my time indoors with my imagination as my sole companion. This untrendy trend lasted through my youth and to some extent through to the present day. I drew the typical made up superheros and original comics that would have landed me a copyright infringement faster than you can say Arachnid Man. However, for a short time in high school I really got carried away and created a character that personified everything that I was not. His name was Macrei.

I had a somewhat difficult time in high school. My middle school was very tiny so I only had about 5 friends going in. Couple that with low self esteem, social anxiety, a few zits and voila! An adolescent vkimo that really didn’t have a chance at all. It was during this time period, I created Macrei. It was sophomore year and my English class had this girl in it to whom I developed the most uncanny fixation known in the history of man for. My buddies and I had a habit of code naming girls we liked after exotic cars. This girl was dubbed Esprit after the legendary Lotus supercar. I sat a few rows behind Esprit and spent entire periods daydreaming about her. I soon created this alternate world and spent hours crafting stories in my notebook during class. My friends actually really dug the fantasy world I was creating. It wasn’t necessarily a storyline, but more like short clips of fiction into this world.

I forget how I came up with the name MacRei. I was reading a lot of fantasy at the time though. Where as I was this weak, shy kid, MacRei was a ferociously strong warrior. We weren’t polar opposites though, I still wanted to connect with MacRei as opposed to him being totally unlike me. So I gave him certain characteristics akin to mine. He was quiet and a dreamer. He had a sword, which I named Valix. It meant, “He who accompanies victory” - Don’t ask my what language or the etymology that’s from because I made it up out of thin air, I’m not Tolkien. It had runes on it and it was constantly covered in flames.

I'm pretty sure the inspiration for Valix was from the Buster Sword in FFVII.

I wasn’t much of an artist, and aside from the pictures you see here, that’s pretty much the extent of MacRei’s world in conceptualized form.

Below you’ll find a direct copy of one of my writings. Notice the seemingly random capitalizations and absurd word play.

        At Last The Day Is Here! The Festival Of Knights has started,

Tis' Opening Day. The Jousting Arena Has been completed, And the Castle Hope

is decorated and in order. The Lush Valleys surrounding Elysia Are In Full

Bloom, Special Flowers were planted the previous Harvest, A Special Hybrid

of Roses and Tulips, Very Beautiful And Fragrant. The land Is now a Reddish

Hue, In honor of Fallen Warriors. The Castle Can be spotted From Miles off.

At its tallest tower A Golden Beacon Has been placed to guide travelers. It

is quite magnificent. But Enough! Look! The First Guests have appeared, The

Trumpets are Playing To welcome....I Can't seem to remember...Oh yes, Tis

Sancho Panza Of MilkShire, Accompanied by his Wife Enengia. My those too

seem quite Larger than their last Visit. On a side note it is tradition that

all of the Specially Invited guests to Come In order of Allegiance, I did

think The Queen of Aragon would be first...They must be running late. Ohhh!

Now Look! It is the Warrior King Eleptes, Followed by his famed One Hundred

Knights. Still a Bachelor it appears.

Almost All the Guest have arrived in the Courtyard. MacRei and the

Queen Should be Making their Appearances Shortly I Wonder though where

Argon's Ambassador is? There they are, Finally! Queen Of the Emerald

Kingdom, Ge, riding atop a Brilliant Chariot, embeded with jewels. The Sun's

Bright Glare makes the chariot glimmer magically. But no Jewel Out shines

The Emerald Queen. Those Eyes...Stories have been told that many a attempt

has been made on her life from Men who sought her hand in marriage, but one

look from those enchanting orbs left them Madd. Her beauty, some say, Rivals

even our Deer Queen! But she is continually clocked to conceal her beauty.

Who is this? A Lone Rider forms her Procession? Is this the Fabled Student

Of Sir Jesus! We must wait for their introduction, "From the Kingdom of

Aragon, Queen Ge and her escort Sir. Leo, Commander of the armed forces of

Aragon!" ahhh the cheers are stupendous! "Now, All our here, The Festival is

now complete! Peoples of Elysia And all other friends of the RidderMark I

now present to you the Queen Of Elysia! Lady Koenigsegg!" All is silent,

where is she...Look! the door it is opening. Good God! Dressed in a Gown of

silkisk Gold out walks the Queen. Why is nobody cheering? It is her

magnificent beauty, all our held in momentary trance. She is walking, no

floating it seems, her elegance is many a poets inspiration. But where is

her escort? Surely it is no mystery that MacRei is the lucky soul, its

tradition for The Champion Knight to Follow. There, by the Roadway! Seated

on a gigantic stallion. MacRei, Dressed in a pure white armor his

trusty blade by his side. He is making his way up the stairs to The Queen.

As also with tradition the Champion makes the official announcement. He is

getting off his Mighty Steed, Making his way up. the suspense is thick, the

whole Kingdom and land for that matter knows that a special announcement is

to be made today. shhhh! he speaks......

                               "Greetings People OF Elysia, And Also to

our guests who have traveled many a mile to be with us this historic day, We

gather to commemorate the Warriors, past and present, who help uphold Good

throughout this fair Land. However this is no ordinary occasion for It is

in special honor to one Of Elysia's greatest Knights, Sir Jesus of the first

Knighthood!''

"It brings me great sorrow to bury my dear friend but I have mourned long

enough, Today we celebrate his efforts, as Sir Jesus would say 'To Hell with

words, bring me my sword or wine'"

Hah the silence has ended with a roar of approval and laughter, but still

there is more, The Queen Is beckoning the applause to cease. She has

something to say...

                        "Welcome Friends, on behalf of Elysia I thank

you for attending this joyous event, it brings me great joy to see you all

here. As you know rumor has been spreading like wildfire about a special

announcement. As you know  I Alone have been ruling over this Kingdom for

many years. Though after the passing of Sir Jesus, I was quite shaken. And I

feel the people deserve a King to  restore the Glory of Elysia, I considered

the action I am, or rather We have taken quite happily. But I leave MacRei to relate that"

" You, People of Elysia have heard the Queen's peace, now I am not an

eloquent speaker for such formal occasions so I will not take long. My heart

rejoices at what I am about to say, and that is that The Queen Has asked for

me to become her Husband, To take her hand in marriage and help rule the

Kingdom Of Elysia......As King!"

Looking back, I definitely got a little grandiloquent and carried away with prose. I just had so much pent up emotions at the time. Puberty had my feelings in a figure four leg lock and I was having major confidence issues. MacRei was my escape, and my friends just loved reading this stuff, possibly because they too were teetering on the bottom of the social ladder with yours truly. If it was a Friday night, you’d most likely find me writing. I even incorporated my friends into the stories and played off their desires by having their love interests rescued and swooned. It was almost like a power source I could tap into anytime. I just got shoved in the hallway on my way to Chemistry? Bust out my Ticonderoga #2 and MacRei roars to life on paper, battling giant ogres (Football Jocks) and stealing maiden’s hearts. Here's the Battle Hymn, which I wrote. It comes off in MacRei's world as a rhyme about surviving a ferocious battle, but in my world it translated into making it through a rough day at school.

I only drew MacRei a few times, with my artistic skills lacking, I really didn’t focus on his looks. Here we see MacRei with a technicolor tunic on, I distinctly remember the inspiration coming from this duvet cover I had that was quilted in much the same manner. As you can see, he’s confidently looking on as Violator from Spawn is creeping out of the darkness.

In this slightly cleaner illustration, MacRei is adorned in body armor with some serious padding. Valix is sheathed behind his back and he has a cape.

MacRei’s creation was initially a way to combat my insecurities, and he soon became a warrior poet who penned many a gooshy love poems. My crush was pretty much on my mind all waking hours, and in my fiction, MacRei would send letters to his betrothed.

I probably wrote this while sitting 3 rows back and 2 seats over to the left during college prep English, maybe.

I hoped you enjoyed my excruciatingly embarrassing jaunt down memory lane.  It was fun finding my old material and reliving my more imaginative days but at the same time painful because I still taste the bitter anxieties I had back then. Some memories definitely belong in the past. I’m glad MacRei was there to lift my spirits. I’m a lot better now and more confident in myself. One day though, things might take a nosedive and I just might have to crack open the spiral bound and summon the warrior again...